This is the theme that plays when Captain Novolin is thinking about his doctors’ advice, but it becomes a parody of California Gurls by Katy Perry. The doctor’s voice in the intro was recorded by Chris DePew, and the singing voice is mine. The lyrics reference healthy tips for diabetics, as well as an infamous typo from the game (“check you feet”), and a few inside jokes between Chris and me. If you’d like to sing along, the lyrics are listed below.

Mm. Goddamn. This. Is. My jam.
Mm. Goddamn. This. Is. My jam.

Mm. Check you feet, and don’t forget to check your glucose.
Before you eat, inject your usual insulin dose.
Put down that cake, you’re diabetic, don’t be reckless. (Goddamn.)
You’ll be fine if you stick, to your recommended breakfast. (Meal plan.)

Have a half a banana, some peanut butter toast, a bowl of cereal,
And a beautiful glassa, some tasty milk. Mm! Mmm-mmm-mmm~

Have a glass of milk, it’s really good for you,
Apple, crackers, afternoon snack. (Mm.)
Check you feet before you put on your shoes.
Mmm-mmm-mm, mm, mmm-mmm-mmm,

Have a glass of milk, it’s really good for you,
Turkey sandwich, go to bed. *smooch*
Test your blood sugar, though, before you do.
Mmm-mmm-mm, mm, mmm-mmm-mmm,

Have a glassa, have a glassa milk,
Have a glassa, have a glassa milk,
Have a glassa